Monday, June 2

Got Muscle?

It's times like these that I seriously consider the benefits of weight-lifting on a regular basis.

The first reason is because yesterday at work I had a patient who was well over 400 pounds. It took 3 nurses, a nurse tech, and the transporter to transfer him to a stretcher to go down to x-ray because he couldn't move much by himself. Later on in the day when I walked into his room by myself, his mother said, "He needs to be moved up in bed." I'm afraid I may have given her a look that said "you are absolutely crazy if you think that I can move this man up in bed by myself." I hope I didn't... I tried to tell her with as little irritation as possible that I could try to get some people to help re-situate him. I asked Jessica to come help me, and between the two of us, I think we may have pulled him up a couple of centimeters.

The second reason I've decided that weight-lifting might not be such a bad idea has to do with today's activities. I decided that I was going to mow the lawn. I got out the riding mower and tried to figure out how it worked. You see, my only previous experience with riding mowers is sitting on my grandfather's lap while he mowed the lawn when I was probably about 6 or 7 years old.

However, I learn fast and it's apparently not that difficult to use a riding mower. As I was getting started, I thought "Kelsey just used this the other day. I wonder if there's enough gas." I brushed the thought away and continued mowing. A short while later, the mower shut off. The truly unfortunate thing is that it stopped at the very bottom of the slightly steep hill of the front yard. I attempted to push it in neutral and got about 2 feet before realizing that there was no way on earth that I would be able to push this mower that probably weighs much more than I do up the long steep hill. I went to plan B. I pushed the mower over under a tree and prayed that no one would bother it.

I found the gas can in the shed and much to my dismay, it was empty. I got in the car, took the gas can to the local gas station, drove back and got started again. I was feeling pretty good about life when the mower decided to cut off yet again. Thankfully, I was near the top of the hill this time, but I still had to push the mower up a slight incline. I think I must have pushed it for a good 20-30 minutes before I got it onto some level ground a few yards away to check the oil. Sure enough, I needed to add some oil.

I checked the shed, the garage, and anywhere else I could think to look for some oil, but found none. I grabbed my keys again and headed off to Wal-Mart. When I got back, I added the oil and tried to start it again. No luck. I adjusted the throttle and the choke and tried again. Hurrah! It worked. I finished the lawn, except for a few areas where I was planning to use a weed-eater.

Due to the inadequacies and general ridiculousness of the electric weed-eater, I ended up knocking on the neighbor's door (a landscaper for Southern whom I had not ever met before) and asking for help. He very kindly offered to get a gas weed-eater for me and bring it up. I went back to the house to wait.

After a while, I heard buzzing outside and realized that he was weed-eating for me! I just thought he was going to let me borrow one... Anyway, I thanked him a great number of times and gave him cookies that I had made.

After all that, I feel very satisfied with having mowed the front lawn. However, I ended up with some bruises on my legs from trying to keep the mower from rolling down the front lawn while pushing it, and my arms are slightly sore.

As I said before, it's times like these that I very seriously consider the benefits of weight-lifting. I was feeling slightly weak and helpless. Although, there is an alternative to weight-lifting to solve my problem...

10 comments:

Alex said...

I find this post quite amusing! I would like to go on to point out that you could remove the word "probably" form your description of the weight of the mower - the smallest of cheap worthless riding mowers easily weighs twice what you do, and anything worth it's salt probably weighs from four to twenty times more. Second I would like to point out that if you have these experiences more often there will be no need for weights as you will get exactly the kind of workout that is most beneficial to what you want the muscles for.

Amy said...

Wow, Kristin! It's amazing how a simple task can sometimes cause such interesting complications.What an adventure! :) Have a great week!

Christy said...

how is it that you can turn such a mundane task into such a hilarious story/adventure? it astounds me...

Kristin said...

Alex: You have two very good points. Thank you for your logic :)

Christy: If we lived in Ted Dekker's books, I would be a Story Teller :P

Joel said...

Thank you Alex for making my point before I could even make it. Have you heard of the story of Milo of Kroton and his bull?

Little Christen said...

The life of Kristin! Wow! Thank you for brightening my day by this great story, though I'm sure it was probably rather irritating at the time. I'll bet it sounds even funnier when told in person! I think I only used a riding lawnmower once as well, other than the many times that I rode on my dad's lap while he cut the grass. Congratulations on a job well done!

Kristin said...

Joel: I'm not sure if you were asking me or Alex, but :) curiosity compels me to say that I have not heard the story, but I would be interested to hear it sometime.

Kristin said...

Christen: I'm glad it made you laugh :) Maybe I'll have some good stories to tell you when I come visit ;)

Anonymous said...

Honey, you failed to tell everyone that you read the manual to figure out how to work the riding mower. Somehow, that adds to the overall story. I was thinking that I need to thank the gentleman who saved your life by not allowing you to use the weedwacker =) Love, Mom E

Kristin said...

I didn't read a manual... There are short, abbreviated steps painted on the mower. Quite a different thing ;)

And maybe you should thank him... Who knows what adventurous stories I would have had to tell if I had used the weed-eater.